Death and Tennis

Prompt: Impossible

black dog

A scruffy black dog runs across the court, black on blue
Sniffs the crotch of the ball boy
Takes a lap
Tongue lolling
Looks for me

She serves
An ace
The black dog scoops up the green ball
Looks for me

He flies over the net
Lands softly
On soft pads
Looks for me

It is his dream
I am there
Find me.

What do you do

What do you do when your dog grows old? When his feet are tired and the pads are worn? When your words of praise are muffled in his ears, and his eyes are milky from their years of use? When his face is grizzled and his color isn’t as vibrant?

You love him.

You rub the feet that dutifully carried him by your side.

You speak your praises more loudly, so everybody else can hear the words that he can’t.

You guide him the way he has guided you, and prevent him from getting lost as you were before he came along.

You kiss his muzzle and admire the wisdom that has beset him in his later years.

And when it comes time to put him to his final rest, knowing that an irreplaceable part of your heart will follow him, you will do so knowing that you loved him.

And he loved you more.

IMG_1096


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  • Written by Jackie Short-Nguyen

And now a request from the audience

Prompt: Brag


Hi Wednesday,

Here I am, laptop in lap, watching Stephen Colbert on TV, wondering why I am so completely and utterly bored by superhero movies, and why Trump doesn’t seem to understand we notice his extreme vanity; i.e. the long ties to make him look taller and less wide, the poofy yellow comb over, the orange tan with reverse raccoon eyes. And more importantly, that he doesn’t seem to know that those vanity strategies don’t actually work for him: we know he’s fat, bald, old, and pasty. None of that would matter a whit if he was a decent and competent man, of course. But that he tries so very hard to be something he is not, and tries so unsuccessfully… well I can’t help but wonder, as I sit here with my laptop.

I don’t have a lot to brag about. I’m aging, I get grey hair, I would like to be less wide and have an impossibly lustrous mane of hair, a dewy youthful complexion. I just never occurred to me to take bad advice about those things. We all see people who have their personal vanities— usually these are harmless and sometimes even endearing. Many women (and men) succumb to inadvisable surgeries and other augmentations. But how many people do you know who go the the transparent and ineffective lengths that the Donald does? Exactly how insecure is he? And should such obvious shallowness, vanity, and cluelessness have alerted voters?

Yes, me and my laptop wonder.

Meanwhile, may I present a few of my favourite cartoons, the first of which is the only one that relates to today’s prompt, “brag”?

cartoon that-s-the-last-time-we-brag-about-our-kids-new-yorker-cartoon_u-l-pgpmlt0

cartoon singer-smashes-banjo-matthew-diffee

cartoon trumps africa


The real prompt was about not being afraid to recognize and appreciate your good qualities, if not brag about them. Let’s do that!

Peace and love,

~~FP

Attention, Shoppers

Prompt: Customer


Hello Wednesday,

I’m just passing through today; have had a busy week what with cannabis, my sister visiting, a birthday party, and decorating a fantasy home, so without further adieu please allow me to present this small collection of my favourite cartoons relating to the casual prompt, “customer”:

I know my dog would window shop if he could, and with more enthusiasm than me:

cartoon dog butcher shop

Is it me or is it crazy that there are whole aisles at the supermarket dedicated to yogurt, potato chips, and yes, water?

cartoon bill-woodman-little-dutch-boy-at-supermarket-holds-his-finger-against-a-bottle-in-the-new-yorker-cartoon_a-G-9191008-8419447

Me, sometime soon:

cartoon attention shoppers


Have a wonderful week— though please check in tomorrow for Throwback Thursday.

~~FP

Spring Training

Prompt: Abrupt


Dear Wednesday,

An acquaintance of mine has textus abruptus, an infliction that many people suffer from—perhaps you know a few?

The symptoms: A normally sweet, gentle, polite person comes off sounding hostile and abruptly dismissive when ever he or she types an email or text. You might text them excitedly inviting them to your spring garden party (if you hold such events) and the textus abruptus victim might respond:

As if. Next?

So you call a neutral sibling or friend and complain about the rudeness. Then you discuss how this person is lacking in basic email subtlety skills and etiquette, and what can be done? An intervention consisting of 15 of their closest email and text pals? No, you decide to take the honestly bewildered route:

Hey, did you have to be so rude when you said no? Are you mad or something?

The TA victim then withdraws— nay, shrinks— from his Hyde-like demeanour and apologizes for the impolite tone of the message, and reminds you they are dangerously allergic to pollen and a spring garden party is out of the question if they are to remain alive and healthy. But thanks for asking! I love you!

The cause of textus abrputus is unknown, but could possible be the result of a pleasant personality who naively believes it is impossible for them, with all their cheery good intentions, to offend. Which is why we call interventions or respond in a confused and concerned way, instead of deleting them from our contacts forever.

Completely unrelated to todays prompt, “abrupt”, is the following collection of a few of my favourite cartoons:

cartoon long walks

cartoon man and children

cartoon spring training


Peace, love, and patience,

~~FP